- When somebody tells you 'yes' but he really does not mean 'yes'.
- When somebody tells you 'ok' but he really does not mean 'ok'.
I call those kind of responses as emotional responses. Its not logical. Its not verbal. Whatever said is not meant really.
Let me give you an example of it.
A kid had bad day at school (because of something) and his dad starts the conversation.
Dad: "Hi honey. How are you?"
Kid replies dryly, "Fine". (he does not really mean he is fine)
Dad : "Hmm .. So what new you did today?"
Kid : "Nothing really ...." (Actually many new things had happened today with him)
Dad: "Ok. Lets have dinner. Wash your hands. Meet you at dining table.".
Kid: "I don't want to eat." (in fact he is too hungry because he even did not had his lunch today in school).
Dad : "Are you sure?"
Kid: "Yes" (his yes is not real yes here)
Dad: "Ok. what are you going to do? Going to sleep?"
Kid: "Um.. I don't know." (he very well knows what he needs to do. He will have to recover from today's events somehow and for that he needs someone who can listen and understand him)
Dad: "Fine. Bye baby. Take care. And if you want any help call me up."
Kid: "Bye. Good night." (here kid does not want his dad to go away from him. In fact he wants him to talk with.)
...
..
..
..
And conversation goes on like this.
Dad does not understand emotional responses of his kid. Dad goes by words. He thinks analytically, logically. He interprets responses by logical mind. But little he knows that responses are emotional.
I encounter this kind of conversation many times in a day. And sometimes I wonder how to handle it. How do you handle this type of responses? In first place, do you believe that person do respond out of his emotion sometimes?
I am not able to decode these kind of responses every time..But yah for people who are close to me, I can know it.
ReplyDeleteI can know it very well.
And about handling them, Its really tough..
It completely depends on person/circumstances how to handle them and make them come out of that situation.
And of course some people respond out of emotions.That completely depends on person who is asking for response.
quite true.. there are two things ... wen the person is too preoccupied in his/her thoughts that they dont see others emotions or that they are too hard skinned
ReplyDeleteIts true how we fail to realise/understand the unspoken words and emotions of others around us(loved ones or acquaintances)... Even if we do understand, we tend to overlook.. cos we dnt know how to handle them or are scared of taking a leap into the deep sea of someone else's emotions.. I guess the only solution to this is compassion towards everyone.. only then we can understand the other person and try to be there for our loved ones and ppl around us ... The world would surely become a better place then :)
ReplyDeleteThanks Shunty, Chinmai, Diva for sharing your thoughts.
ReplyDeleteWhenver I think about an emotional response, I think about this song of TZP:
Main Kabhi Batlata Nahin
Par Andhere Se Darta Hoon Main Maa
Yun To Main,Dikhlata Nahin
Teri Parwaah Karta Hoon Main Maa
Tujhe Sab Hain Pata, Hain Na Maa
Tujhe Sab Hain Pata,,Meri Maa
Nicely written. Showing a little boy's never expressed feelings.